How to cope up with bad times

Sometimes we face a bad phase. It seems like everything is going wrong. Don't worry it just a bad time. Here are four important things to keep in mind when you want to turn things around in your life.

1) Embrace setbacks as learning opportunities.
Thomas Edison famously said, "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." Edison had a growth, as opposed to a fixed, mindset. He did not see failure as the end of a process but rather the beginning of a new one. Likewise, we need to view so-called defeats through a lens of opportunity. 

What happened that we can do better next time? What did we learn that will help us in the future? Anyone who has ever been successful has gone through rough patches when they experienced failure, some of them multiple times. But the things that separate successful people from those who bump along the bottom is the attitude, the belief that a setback will lead to an opportunity for success. If we can convince ourselves of this and believe it, things will turn around.


2) Shift your perspective. 

One phrase that I use when things aren't going well for me and I am close to feeling sorry for myself is "Compared to what?" I'm having a terrible day....compared to what? Everything in my life is going wrong....compared to what? The Such and such task is really hard....compared to what? Compared to not knowing where your next meal is coming from? Compared to being in combat fighting a war? We often get so wrapped up in our own insular worlds that we forget to step back and put things in perspective.  And that "compared to what" helps me do that. Maybe things aren't going well at work....compared to not having a job that isn't so bad. 

3) Identify things that energize you and pursue them. 

When you have the feeling that things are going wrong or you are experiencing setbacks it is important to find activities/tasks/people that provide you uplifting energy.  Maybe it is a phone conversation with a close friend (I mostly do that), maybe it is getting a good workout in, perhaps it is reading a book for an hour....whatever it is, do it. The feeling you get from that energy-giving activity will sustain you when other things around you aren't perfect and give you the motivation to keep going. 

4) Start finding small successes.

If things are going wrong one way you can start making them go right is by finding small successes in your life every day. And you have control over this! You alone set the things you want to achieve and you alone have control over being successful at those things. For instance....maybe you just want to start your day feeling better. OK. Make a list of three things you are going to do every morning that will have you feeling good as your start your day - make the bed, have coffee, read the newspaper for 30 minutes. Those are 3 little things you can do every day then that will get you feeling good right off the bat. As you master those small tasks, move to larger items and keep building. 

Finally, I would like to add a quote by Nancy Greene, "I think what it takes to succeed remains the same. You have to have a real love of your sport to carry you through all the bad times, you still want to go ski even when things aren't working. You must have a commitment to work hard and to never give up."

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How to boost your willpower

While reading I came across this interesting article on quora; Worth reading.

Give yourself a giant boost of willpower to get you going!

How can you do that?

By asking yourself one small yet powerful question first thing in the morning:

What is the one thing I am committed to completing today?

Why is this question important?

• It simplifies your life so that you don’t overwhelm yourself with too many choices you need to make on any given day.
• It encourages you to think strategically about your life one day at a time.
• It keeps you focused on your goals instead of getting distracted by other things.
• It forces you to prioritize what it relevant to you.
• It serves as a personal promise to yourself to do something you've identified as critical to your personal progress.

How can you incorporate it into your daily life?

• Write it down: take a large sheet of paper and write the question in big bold letters.
• Hang it on your bedroom or bathroom wall so it's easy to see.
• Make it part of a unique background for your computer or cell phone.
• Use it as the main heading at the top of your journal entry for each day.
• Ask the question aloud as you are brushing your teeth or getting ready.
• Give an answer on the spot out loud, or write it down in your journal.

How will it improve the quality of your life?

• You ensure that you use your willpower only for what is most important to you, and you don’t waste it on things that are trivial, irrelevant, or distracting in any way.
• When you are focused on your personal commitments, it gives you a sense of purpose: it gives your life meaning, helps you understand you have something of value to contribute, and improves the quality of your day to day life.
• Knowing in advance the work you need to accomplish saves you time so that you don't waste hours evaluating multiple priorities throughout the day.
• Committing to just ONE thing helps your brain perform more optimally, freeing it from cluttered thoughts and giving it space to concentrate on what you consider the most important goal of the day.

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Guide to accelerate your personal growth.

Accelerating your career means moving farther and faster than other people in your same career track. You will only achieve this through:

1. Taking risks that your peers do not
2. Working with people who are among the best in your field
3. Working for a company that is growing so fast that you gain access to opportunities that would otherwise never be available

If you look at all the most successful people you know or have read about, you will find a few striking patterns.

First you'll notice that you MUST take risks to get ahead. The road less traveled is by definition the only road that will allow you to get ahead because getting ahead means doing things differently. Go for big successes or big failures. Anything in between doesn't stand out. The worst thing you can be in your career is invisible.

Second, you'll notice that the people who accomplish a lot ALWAYS surrounded themselves with exceptional people smarter than themselves. From Steve Jobs to Gandhi, they were able to recognize, attract, and retain great people.

Lastly, the type of product, company, and industry you are working in will heavily influence your future opportunities. Tech is a great place to be no matter what your skill set is. 

To borrow a quote from Eric Schmidt to Sheryl Sandberg, "Get on a rocket ship. When companies are growing quickly and they are having a lot of impact, careers take care of themselves. And when companies aren’t growing quickly or their missions don’t matter as much, that’s when stagnation and politics come in. If you’re offered a seat on a rocket ship, don’t ask what seat. Just get on."

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4 simple steps to Improve your brain power

Memory can be trained similar to any muscle, it just takes time and persistence.There are people who can just remember a pack of cards by seeing it once. Indeed a young boy, NISCHAL NARAYAN, from India has placed his name in guinness world record for his memory capacity. He is being regarded as one of the 7 brilliant minds in world. At the age of 12 he could remember 250 digits.

So how is it possible?

first of all its not a God gift. U can be one but u have to train yourself.

So what they do is they try to imagie the stuff they want to remember. It's easy to remember things if u could imagine it. Images helps to recall things easily.

For example if u have to remember 5 stuff let that be pen, book bread, laptop, bed. So what u have to actually do is imagine that you are actually seeing this stuff. so imagine that u have to study so u took out PEN and BOOK and then u felt hungry so ate Bread and after that took out your LAPTOP to play games and finally went to BED to sleep. So now u can remember all the 5 items. Initially u may find difficulty to imagine stuff but once u do I guarantee u won't forget. U can always think about your home to imagine as u are quite familiar about it. So that's what every memory master do. They do exactly the same the thing but fast which needs practice.

You want to think of the 4 steps of memory:

Spot: you can't remember a thing if you haven't perceived it! Develop your focus when you study or listen, be aware of your favourite sensory canal, increase your attention span...

Link: remembering isn't exactly recording something; most of times it's more connecting a new piece of information to an already memorized one, what's called memory pegs; see for instance the 'memory palaces' technique; here you'll find all the mnemonics, tricks and techniques (numerical method for instance); most of them pertain to visualization development.

Retain: you want to revise whatever you want to remember; the natural rhythm of memory is : 1 hour, 1 day, 1 week, 1 month => commitment to long term memory;

Retrieve: activate the techniques and mnemonics you have used in order to retrieve whatever you committed to memory.

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Improve your life with these healthy habits

Every effort for improving life takes us more close to our goal. For achieving something we need to make some of the rules towards life. Some of the restrictions we need to follow. They say "Kite can only fly high if it is attached to the string." These are the simple things you can try improving your life.

Step out of your comfort zone.

Unless we are going to something different we will be doing same thing over and over. After a while life will be boring. Every day try to do something new and step out of your comfort zone because it is the only way you can grow as person.

Gain Knowledge

Every day learn something new, read something new, listen to something new. Remember knowledge makes you money.

Never stop fighting until you arrive at your destined place - that is, the unique you. Have an aim in life, continuously acquire knowledge, work hard, and have perseverance to realize the great life. 
--A. P. J. Abdul Kalam

Wake up early

Morning time is soothing, filled with positive air and peace. Think of this time as a pre-game warm up, allowing your mind to mentally prepare for the coming challenges. Waking up early is an extremely useful tool for self-reflection and meditation in the daily arsenal of the wealthy.

Short Fitness session (Morning)

Morning fitness sessions fill your day with energy. It gives you enough juice throughout the day. (abs, core training for 15 minutes). This session helps your body wake up and pump some blood in your muscles, and brain. 

10 minutes for yourself.

Every day make 10 minutes with yourself. Spend this 10 minutes with yourself with your goals and meditation. This habit can be life changing for you.  Sometimes when things don't go as you wanted to you are in rush you can do this recharge to yourself. After these 10 minutes, you will feel fresh, calm positive and motivated.

Smile

Smile spreads positive energy around you. Greet people with that beautiful smile. Smile is very powerful. It can change other people day and even life. Also smiling make you more beautiful. If you have to attend your client just put that smile and the positive vibes will surround you.

Dream time

In the middle of the day no matter where you are or what you are doing, take 30 minutes pause. Turn off your phone and internet, and create vision where you have achieved your goals and dreams. See it, feel it. Make your dream path clear which will help you get clear vision of your goal.

Love call

Take your phone and call your wife or husband, girlfriend or boyfriend, or to family member. Tell them how much you love them and how great they are.  It only takes 30 seconds, but these seconds could be life changing. Also, I suggest you to meet new people which help you expand your vision. When you talk with your favorite person you get that happy feeling from inside which definitely help you improve your mood.

Time machine

Before bedtime take yourself back to your day. Analyze your day. Analyzing your day will help you check whether you are leading towards your set goals or not.

Also read: Routine is the enemy of time

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12 psychological hacks in life to get everything done.

People like to be favoriate. Everybody likes when people listen to them. Here are some of the psycological tricks to make yourself more likable and get things done.

1. Go to you managers with solutions instead of problems

Everyone brings problems but very few people bring solutions. If you're the one bringing solutions you will be noticed and rewarded for it.

2. Try shutting up

If someone gives you a lousy answer to a question, stay quiet and keep eye contact and they’ll usually feel pressured to keep talking and reveal more. I don't know why it works, but it always does, especially in high stakes situations like negotiations.

3. Trick them into liking you

The Ben Franklin effect is a proposed psychological phenomenon: A person who has performed a favor for someone is more likely to do another favor for that person than they would be if they had received a favor from that person. An explanation for this would be that we internalize the reason that we helped them was because we liked them. The opposite case is also believed to be true, namely that we come to hate a person whom we did wrong to. We de-humanize them to justify the bad things we did to them.

4. Say their Name a lot

The most charming people have the strange habit of using your name a lot. When you meet someone, help yourself remember their name by saying it a lot in conversation which has the added effect of making them like you.

5. Excitement is contagious


If you're nervous about something, cover it up with excitement and the people around you will key in and reflect that excitement. Pretty soon you won't be nervous anymore because of all the good vibes.

6. Touch them a little


Touch is a powerful tool. Waiters who learn the art of unobtrusive touching are tipped more. When talking to someone lightly touch them on the arm, thigh, or knee to emphasize your points and to make them comfortable around you.

7. Be an Active listener

Ask clarifying questions, maintain eye contact, and make remarks like uh huh and really. Talk Less Say More, how to make your words sensational

8. Learn the pause

The optimal rate of speech is 3.5 words per second and you should pause 4-5 times a minute.

9. Make them think you compromised

If you want $10 start out by asking for $50. When the person refuses, ask them for the $10 instead to "help you along" they feel bad for refusing you and will jump on the opportunity to give you 10 bucks.

10. Wait until they're tired

When we're tired, our mental energy drops. We're less able to perform higher cognitive activities like weighing pros and cons in a decision. If you want to get someone to agree to something they'd normally refuse, wait until they're tired before dropping the bomb.

11. Don't tell them they're wrong

Instead acknowledge their stance, state where you have common ground, and articulate your own points. This will make them much more likely to listen to you.

12. Just nod

Nodding is a universal sign of agreement right. When you nod in front of someone they'll start to nod as well. This turns them to an agreement state of mind and sets the groundwork to allow you to ask for favors.

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Is talking a lot a sign of weakness?

There is a subtle difference between talking effectively and talking less. While talking effectively means to choose your words carefully so that you can best express your ideas in a precise and concise manner, speaking less doesn't necessarily mean you are sending your message across clearly. In short, talk less doesn't mean talk effectively, but to talk effectively means that you have to talk less.

“A good speech should be like a woman's skirt; long enough to cover the subject and short enough to create interest.”  -- Winston S. Churchill

Talking a lot can be seen as talking ineffectively. That doesn't mean a person who talks a lot is less intelligent or has nothing interesting to say. I know a lot of very intelligent and interesting people, but they are just not great conversationalists. Great knowledge, poor delivery. I don't think that is a sign of weakness because I know that they are great individuals.

Knowledge brings the power with it. A person is said to be wise according to the way he delivers his knowledge to others. Speech or talk decides the strength of a person. At some extents, talkative people are more interested in seeking attention. 

Though talkative people are not weak but the people who talk less seems to be more powerful. I have seen talkative people who are always surrounded with friends. People prefer to spend time with talkative than that of less.

“For millions of years, mankind lived just like the animals. Then something happened which unleashed the power of our imagination. We learned to talk and we learned to listen. Speech has allowed the communication of ideas, enabling human beings to work together to build the impossible. Mankind's greatest achievements have come about by talking, and its greatest failures by not talking. It doesn't have to be like this. Our greatest hopes could become reality in the future. With the technology at our disposal, the possibilities are unbounded. All we need to do is make sure we keep talking.”  ― Stephen Hawking

Who cares what they think about strengths and weaknesses. Keep talking and be happy.

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Importance of walking for healthy living

"Beauty surrounds us, but usually we need to be walking in a garden to know it."   - Rumi

Walking has been considered as one of the easiest and most convenient exercises. It is a great way to improve or maintain your overall health. Just 30 minutes every day can increase cardiovascular fitness, strengthen bones, reduce excess body fat, and boost muscle power and endurance. It can also reduce your risk of developing conditions such as heart disease, type 2 diabetes, osteoporosis and some cancers. Unlike some other forms of exercise, walking is free and doesn’t require any special equipment or training.

1. Walking strengthens your heart

Reduce your risk of heart disease and stroke by walking regularly. It’s great cardio exercise, lowering levels of LDL (bad) cholesterol while increasing levels of HDL (good) cholesterol. The Stroke Association says that a brisk 30-minute walk every day helps to prevent and control the high blood pressure that causes strokes, reducing the risk by up to 27 percent.

2. Walking lowers disease risk

A regular walking habit slashes the risk of type 2 diabetes by around 60 percent, and you’re 20 percent less likely to develop cancer of the colon, breast or womb with an active hobby such as walking.

3. Walking helps you lose weight

You’ll burn around 75 calories simply by walking at 2mph for 30 minutes. Up your speed to 3mph and it’s 99 calories, while 4mph is 150 calories. Work that short walk into your daily routine and you’ll shed the pounds in no time.

4. Walking prevents dementia

Older people who walk six miles or more per week are more likely to avoid brain shrinkage and preserve memory as the years pass.

5. Walking tones up legs, bums and tums

Give definition to calves, quads and hamstrings while lifting your glutes (bum muscles) with a good, regular walk. Add hill walking into the mix and it’s even more effective. Pay attention to your posture and you’ll also tone your abs and waist.

6. Walking boosts vitamin D

We all need to get outside more. Many people in the UK are vitamin D deficient, affecting important things like bone health and our immune systems. Walking is the perfect way to enjoy the outdoors while getting your vitamin D fix.

7. Walking gives you energy

You’ll get more done with more energy, and a brisk walk is one of the best natural energizers around. It boosts circulation and increases oxygen supply to every cell in your body, helping you to feel more alert and alive. Try walking on your lunch break to achieve more in the afternoon.

It’s true – exercise boosts your mood. Studies show that a brisk walk is just as effective as antidepressants in mild to moderate cases of depression, releasing feel-good endorphins while reducing stress and anxiety. So for positive mental health, walking’s an absolute must.

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How to overcome loneliness

Everyone feels lonely sometimes.While it’s normal to feel lonely or isolated from time to time, too much loneliness can be unhealthy or even dangerous. Numerous studies have linked excessive, ongoing feelings of loneliness and isolation to depression, mental illness, and even physical problems such as insomnia, diabetes, high blood pressure, and heart disease.

The good news is, loneliness is a condition that can be fought against and overcome! Here are some of the things we can do to remove loneliness.

1. Take a walk.

Walking has been proven to offer many great health benefits both for the body and the mind. Any form of exercise would do as well, but walking is better because it allows one to explore their town or the area around them in a way a car simply does not allow. While walking, take a different route than you usually would to get to a usual goal point. Even better, simply pick a direction at random and start. Just the feeling of walking down the street, surrounded by traffic and other people, can make you feel more involved in the pulse of your city or town.

2. Hobby time.

Everyone has an interest or passion, and sometimes a fresh point of view can help you enhance your talents or interests in new and surprising ways. Even the smallest town usually has at least some clubs. Perhaps you are interested in public service, in which case the Rotary Club, Kiwanis, or the Lions Club might be a good fit. Maybe you enjoy chess and would like to play with others to sharpen your skills. You could even consider something you’ve never tried before: pottery, writing, wine tasting, or even dancing are all good ways to interact with others and try new things.

3. Talk to people.

Noe days between texting, Tweeting, Facebooking, email and the phone, people are more connected than ever before. The problem with all these kinds of communication is that they omit the face-to-face element of socialization. This can lead to situations like someone observing, “I have 6,000 friends on Facebook, 4,822 Twitter followers, and who knows how many people watching me on social media…and I don’t have one person I can call to go out for the night!” Try getting out and talking to your neighbors, the cashier at the convenience store, or even total strangers. Ask questions and listen carefully to the answers. This is a great way to make new connections, or maybe meet people who share your interests and hobbies.

4. Go to the coffee shop.

These days you can’t throw a rock without hitting a coffee shop, especially in the larger cities. Coffee shops are a great place to meet people and make contacts. As with any other social situation, it’s not enough simply to sit there sipping on your favorite coffee. Compliment someone on their purse, their shoes, their tie, or even their laptop. A compliment is a good way to start up a conversation and might just make you a new friend.

5. Be alert to verbal and nonverbal cues.

90% of all communication is nonverbal, based upon eye contact, body language, facial expression, and unconscious gestures and motions. These cues, when taken with verbal indicators such as word choice, tone of voice, and overall “projection,” create communication. Look for people with positive, open body language. These people carry themselves with their heads erect and make direct eye contact. They don’t keep their hands in their pockets or move aside more than necessary to allow others to pass on the street. A smile could be an invitation to talk. Be ready to accept it!

6. Try nurturing others.

Caring for others matters. Visiting, conversing with, or reading to the elderly makes them feel more connected and useful, especially if they live in an assisted-care facility. Serving as a child or teen mentor can help you pass on knowledge and information to the next generation, whether it’s practical advice and skills such as how to work a polynomial equation, or giving them life lessons like how to get over a broken heart or dealing with indifferent or unfriendly peers and authority figures. By caring for others, you can also care for yourself by showing you have something of value to contribute to your world and the people in it.

7. Get a pet.

Happiness is a warm puppy. This seemingly simple idea is actually backed by a wealth of scientific and anecdotal data. A fuzzy animal like a cat, dog, or even a ferret makes a great companion and confers health benefits. Studies indicate that simply petting an animal reduces blood pressure, anxiety, and may actually be an effective non-medical treatment for certain forms of depression. In addition, the playful antics of a puppy or kitten and the joy of training them to perform various tricks and tasks more than makes up for any inconvenience they may cause while housebreaking. 

8. Try to figure out what’s missing.

Introverts like their own company, but it’s easy to get too much of it. When this happens, ask yourself what’s changed. Are you with someone who makes you feel lonely even when they’re right next to you? Are you in a new town, job, or living space? Do your surroundings or routines feel stale and overdone? What’s making you unhappy with the situation? In some cases, people feel lonely because something is missing. In others, people feel lonely because something needs to be subtracted. This can be harder to identify, because we always try to hold on to the things we believe make us happy and define us. A big part of overcoming loneliness is defining oneself on one’s own terms.

9. If all else fails, seek help.

If you’ve tried some or all of these things and nothing seems to be helping, it’s time to find someone. Spend time with your loved ones, go hangout with friends. Have brunch with family these all things are surely helpful to come out of your loneliness, after all its a state of mind.

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This is why being lazy could make you wildly successful

Bill Gates once said that he would always "hire a lazy person to do a difficult job" at Microsoft. Why? "Because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it."

Have you ever just sat around doing absolutely nothing? No errands, no agenda, not even any TV! If so did you find it difficult? Perhaps you felt restless or even guilty. Our society values work, productivity and “doing.” Not being engaged in some type of activity is seen as negative and unproductive. But in all honesty there is a great deal of spiritual value in being lazy.

As children we were told that we would never amount to anything if we were lazy and that hard work was the key to success. But what if laziness could actually help you go further in life?
There are a few reasons why being an eager beaver isn't always a good idea. Some problems may end up getting solved without any effort from you. And is a first-mover advantage all it's cracked up to be?
It's the second mouse that gets the cheese. The hapless first mouse could end up getting trapped in its efforts to get ahead.
Here are some of the ways you can use your laziness to your advantage and turn procrastination into an asset.

Too lazy to be lazy

Sometimes, laziness can be used to protect you from yourself. According to Karthick Venkatesh, who posts advice on question-and-answer network Quora, he has a 29-character password for Facebook and Twitter.
"When I have to work, I just log off from these," he says. "So, whenever I feel like taking a break and using Facebook, I am just too lazy to type my password.
"Eventually, owing to my laziness, I go back to work and have a really productive day."

Why procrastination works

If you wait until the last minute to complete a task, you are forced to focus on the project at hand. There’s nothing like not having enough time to complete a project to make you realize what’s critical, and what isn’t.
If you start early on a project and stick faithfully to the schedule, you almost always do more work than need. But if you wait until the last minute to work on something, the stress of it automatically narrows your focus to what’s important, and you quickly jettison the rest.You'll work quickly and efficiently, and get it done.

Make the machine do it

Phones, lifts, cars, all these things were invented to avoid or minimize work. Lazy people automate as much as possible. Rather than tweeting throughout the day, for example, they will use a service like TweetDeck to schedule tweets for the whole day in one go. Job done; time for a cup of tea.

Are you lazy? Or just really good?

You may be lazy because you’re good at your job.
Really efficient people will naturally have more downtime than their peers.
If you finish a task, and find yourself watching cat videos or liking endless pictures on Facebook, is it because you've finished your work early? Are you twiddling your thumbs because you have nothing else left to do?

Make money while you sleep

Lazy entrepreneurs build businesses that generate revenue, even when they aren't anywhere near their desk.
Online products such as training videos, e-books or subscriptions to online content or services could all make money while you sleep, and require minimal input from the business owner.
The explosion in peer-to-peer lenders has also offered lazy people the opportunity to make money by effectively doing nothing - just collecting the interest. Caveat: there is always risk involved in issuing loans.
But there are even ways of making traditional business models successful while being lazy. If you are selling a product, for example, create a range that is like a McDonald's menu.
Produce five things - burgers, fries, chicken, salad and soft drinks - and just package it all differently and sell them in different combinations to cut down on time and effort.

How to build a lazier society
Working just four hours a week might seem ridiculous to many, but how about a four-hour workday?
A shorter working week would have interesting theoretical benefits. If everyone worked fewer hours, more people would be required to get the job done, reducing unemployment.
Less work would produce slower economic growth but it would also reduce the consequences of that growth, such as pollution. Work, as a commodity, would increase in value - sweat equity is frequently dismissed these days because everyone puts in such long hours.
It would also solve the eternal question: how to achieve a work/life balance. A four-hour workday would leave plenty of time for family and child care.
There could also be resulting health benefits. Burn-outs, stress and inactivity would be reduced, which would reduce the risk of heart disease, diabetes and Alzheimer's.

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